Chapter One

In a tiny flat in Paya Terubong ...

"Wah4 gai3 liau4!"

"Ah3 Huat3, ha1mik1 yang3 gai3?" Ah3 Pa1 ceh3 khi4 lai2. "Lu4 than3 cit3-khien1 lang2 co3 lu4-eh3 ka1wan1, boh3 ho4 meh4?"

"Ah3 Pa1, lan4-eh3 chu3 ba3lu1 700 hong3chiok3, cat1 siang3ka1 sar3din3 hu2-eh3 tin3, Ah3 Pa1 kokh1 chnia4 cit3-khien1 ang3mor3 knia4 lai3 tua3 ka1 lan4, mana boleh?!"

"Ka1 lau3juak1 gok3 mah1?" Ah3 Pa1 kong4.

"Lau3juak1? Ah3 Pa1 oi4, mm33 si33 cit3 meh2, mm33 si33 cit3 leh1pai3, tun1 mm33 si33 cit3-ko1 goay1. Cit1-khien1 lang2 kong3si1 wah4-eh3 pang3keng1 cit3 ni2 ah3. Cit3 nie2! Ah3 Pa1 oi4, wah1 boek1 siau4 khee3 liau4!"

Ah3 Huat3 ceh3 lok1 lai2. Ie1 liam3 a1boay3 liau4 gok3.

"Tha1na1 ba1lu1 wah4 beng3pek1! Wah4 sniau3 kong4, lu4 haeh3 nor33-can3-eh3 bin3cherng2 ti1 wah4-eh3 pang3keng1, wah4 than1 chnia4 wah4-eh3 peng3iu4 lai3 khoon1 meh2. Guan3lai2 mm33 si33. Ah3 Pa1 oi4, cit3 nie2 ah3!"

"Hai1ya3, kuan1si3 tok3 ho4 liau4 lah4!" Ah3 Pa1 tap3.

"Kuan1si3 ah3?"

"Mang3 kong4 ka1 kae1 liau4," Ah3 Mak3 kong4, "Kio3 lu1-eh3 chee4 lai3 ciak3 pnui3."

Ah3 Huat3 jiang4 tua1-tua1 sniah1, "Abby! Abby! Lai3 ciak3 pnui3!"

"Abby?" Ah3 Mak3 mui3, "cui33-cui33 lang2 si33 Abby?"

Ah3 Huat3-eh3 chee4 jip1 lai2. "Ah3 Huat3, lu4 cin3 cham4-eh2 ah3! Ha1mik1 su3 kio3 wah4 Abby ti1 Ah3 Mak3 ka1 Ah3 Pa1-eh3 thau3ceng2?!"

"Ah3 Huat3, mm33 thang3 boh3 tua3 boh3 se3!" Ah3 Mak3 kong4. "Ee1 khah1 tua3 goay3 lu4, kio3 ee1 Chee3 Chee4! Ee1 pun1 mm33 si33 mia3 Abby. Ee1 mia3 Ah3 Bee4!"

"Ah3 Mak3, ti1 gua3khau4, Ah3 Bee3 tok3 mia3 ... "

"Lu4 tiam3 lu4-eh3 chui3!" Ah3 Bee4 jiang4.

Ah3 Pa1 mui3, "Ah3 Bee4, ti33si2 lu4 pien3 Abby?"

"Ah3 Pa1! Mm33 si33 wah4 cit3 lang2 nia3. Cit1 khien4, tua3 gua3khau4 mah3 mm33 si33 mia3 Ah3 Huat3. Lu1 cai1 ie1 mia3 ha1mik1 boh2? Hennnnry!"

"Haaaa! Kokh1 tiok3 wah4 gok3!" Ah3 Huat3 jiang4. "Ah3 Pa1, wah4 ka3 lu1 kong4. Tua3 ti1 wah4-eh3 pan1, ka3nia33 wah4 cit1 lang2 uh3 Hok1kien1 mia2 - chun1-eh2 ka1liau4 uh3 Hwa3 Gi1 mia2, lang3-eh3 mia2 uh3 Z-lah1, X-lah1, Q-lah1, wah3 cit3 lang2-eh3 mia2 uh3 H pu1lak1! Ah3 Huat3, si1paek3 lau33ya2, siang3ka1 beh33 ko3pi1-eh3 Ah3 Pek3!"

"Hai4! Ha1mik1 sa3lah3 uh3 Hok1kien1 mia2? Lan4 co1 Hok1kien1 lang2 mah1, eng3kai1 uh3 Hok1kien1 mia2 loh4," Ah3 Pa1 kong4. "Ah3 Huat3, lu1 mien1 huan3loh4. Cit1-leh1 ang3mor3 knia4 mae3 nie2 ba3lu1 lai2."

"Tha1na1 pang1kae4, kokh1 nor33-ko1 goay1 tok3 si33 mae3 nie2 loh4," Ah3 Huat3 tap3.

"Kao1giak3 tiam1sniah1 hor33 lu4 cun1pi3 mah1," Ah3 Pa1 kong4. "Nah3, wah1 uh3 ie1-eh3 tien3phe1 tay3ci4 cit1-peng2. Sia4 cit3-tniau3 tien3phe1 huan3ging2 ie1 lai2."

"Ka1liau4 tun1 si33 wah4 tiok3 co3!" Ah3 Huat3 chan1.

"Mm33 si33 ka1liau4 lu4 tiok3 co3," Ah3 Pa1 kong4, "Si3 ka1liau4 lu4 tun3 liam3!"

"Liau4, ha1mik1 si33 tien3phe1 tay3ci4?" Ah3 Huat3 kong4. "Ti1 Penang, ka1liau1 lang2 kong4 email address, lu4 cit3 lang2 kong4 tien3phe1 tay3ci4. Ah3 Pa1, lu4-eh3 Hok1kien1 wa3 si1paek3 tet1pet1!"

"Mm33 si33 tet3pet1," Ah3 Bee4 ciap3. "Si3 si1paek3 ki3kuai3!"

"Hah3 lah3, hah3 lah3, lu1lang2 nor33 khien4 suan1 Ah3 Pa1," Ah3 Pa1 kong4. "Cit3 jit1 Ah3 Pa1 sim3cong3 pnae3 to4 ti1 thor3kha1 ba3lu1 lu1lang2 ka1 cai1!"

"Choi4, choi4, choi4!" Ah3 Mak3 maeh3 liau4. "Ciak3 pnui3! Mang3 kong1 wa3 liau4!"

"Wah1 ciak3 pa4 liau4!" Ah3 Pa1 kong4. Ie1 paek3 khi4 lai2. "Wah1 tiok3 chu3 khee1 ya3 hoe3 liau4. Kin3 meh2 uh3 pasar malam. E33ki1 sia4 heh1-leh1 email hah4?"

"O1kay4lah4 Ah3 Pa1," Ah3 Huat3 kong4.

Vocabulary


  1. ang3 kong1 [aŋ-kɔŋ]: (noun) Taoist deity

  2. ang3mor3 knia4 [aŋ-mɔ-kiã]: white boy

  3. beng3pek1 [beŋ-pek]: (verb) to understand

  4. bin3cherng2 [bin-tshəŋ]: (noun) bed

  5. boh3 tua3 boh3 se3 [bo-tua-bo-se]: (phrase) impertinent (literally, "neither big nor small")

  6. cat1 [tsat]: (adjective) cram

  7. choi4 [tsɔi]: (interjection) exclamation of negativity

  8. ciap3 [tsiap]: (verb) to connect, to add in

  9. cham4 [tsam]: (adjective) terrible

  10. chan1 [tshan]: (verb) to moan

  11. Chee3 Chee4 [tsi-tsi]: (noun) Elder Sister

  12. chnia4 [tshiã]: (verb) to invite

  13. e3ki3 [e-ki]: (verb) to remember

  14. gai3 liau4 [gai-liau]: (phrase) done for

  15. gua3khau4 [gua-khau]: (preposition) outside

  16. guan3lai2 [guan-lai]: (adverb) actually, in reality

  17. haeh3 [hɛ]: (verb) to place, to put

  18. hai1ya3 [hai-ia]: (interjection) bummer

  19. hong3chiok3 [hɔŋ-tshiok]: (noun) square feet

  20. huan3ging2 [huan-giŋ]: (verb) to welcome

  21. Hwa3 Gu4 [hua-gu]: (noun) Mandarin

  22. jiang4 [dziaŋ]: (verb) shout

  23. ka1wan1 [ka-uan]: (noun) friend (Malay loanword)

  24. ki3kuai3 [ki-kuai]: (adjective) strange, odd

  25. kong3si1 [kɔŋ-si]: (verb) to share

  26. kuan1si3 tok3 ho4 liau4 [kuan-si-toʔ-ho-liau]: (phrase) get used to it

  27. lau3juak1 [lau-dzuak]: (adjective) fun, entertaining

  28. lau33ya2 [lau-ia]: (adjective) unsophisticated, old-fashioned

  29. leh1pai3 [le-pai]: (noun) week

  30. liam3 [liam]: (verb) to grumble, to moan

  31. mae3 nie2 [mɛ-ni]: (noun) next year

  32. maeh3 [mɛ]: (verb) to scold

  33. meh2 [mɛ] (noun) night

  34. mana boleh [ma-na-bo-le]: how can? (Malay loanword)

  35. mm33 thang3 [m-thaŋ]: (verb) don't

  36. nie2 [ni]: (noun) year

  37. nor33-can3-eh3 bin3cherng2 [nɔ-tsan-e-bin-tshəŋ]: (noun) double-decker bed

  38. oi4 [oi]: vocative interjection

  39. pan1 [pan]: (noun) class

  40. pang1kae4

  41. pasar malam [pa-sar-ma-lam]: (noun) night market (Malay loanword)

  42. pien3 [piɛn]: (verb) to become

  43. sa3lah3 [sa-lah]: (adjective) wrong, guilty (Malay loanword)

  44. sar3din3 hu2-eh3 tin1 [sar-din-hu-e-tin]: (noun) can of sardine

  45. si33 [si]: (verb) is

  46. si4 [si]: (verb) to die

  47. si1paek3 [si-pɛk]: (adjective) extremely, exceedingly

  48. siau4 khee3 liau4 [siau-khi-liau]: (phrase) go crazy

  49. sim3cong3 pnae3 [sim-tsɔŋ-pɛ̃]: (noun) heart attack

  50. suan1 [suan]: (verb) to mock

  51. sniau3 kong4 [siãu-kɔŋ]: (phrase) thought

  52. ti33si2 [ti-si]: (adverb) when, at what time

  53. tet3pet1 [tɛt-pɛt]: (adjective) unique, exceptional, special

  54. thau3ceng2 [thau-tseŋ]: (preposition) front

  55. thek3 hoe3 [theʔ-hoe]: (verb) to collect goods

  56. thor3kha1 [thɔ-kha]: (noun) floor

  57. tiam3 lu4-eh3 chui3 [tiam-lu-e-tsui]: (phrase) keep your mouth shut

  58. ya3 hoe3 [ia-hoe]: (verb) to collect goods

This is a fictional story. All characters and events in this story are fictional. Any resemblance to actual people and events is purely coincidental.

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